New Year II

It's already 5 days into 2009. Things are pretty much the same thus far, the way it has been.

I've never made any resolution or wishes in the past, maybe because I was pretty much happy with the way things were.

But this year seems rather different. At least, the New Year itself gave me some indifferent feelings.

In my New Year post, I said:
"Good bye 2008.. you haven't been great, but you haven't been that bad either
Welcome 2009.. hopefully, things will be much better than before".

Yeah, 2008 hasn't really been a great year. The 2nd and 3rd quarter of 2008 has given me probably some of the best memories I've ever had thus far in life, but come the last quarter, all these took a nose-dive.

Basically, I was not a happy man. There were times I just wish I was somewhere else. Being at work sickens me, so I wished I could be out of the office. Staying at home annoys me, so I sometimes wished I'm out of the house... yet when I'm actually out of the house, the feeling of being lost haunts me.

And at times, I felt lonely...

I've also posted one of my thoughts that has been troubling for a while now. Maybe I've always been the more reliable one, the one who could bare responsibilities, ever since I was a child. But that has finally starting to show cracks in me.

If there's ever a resolution that I would make for this year, it is probably to be MORE irresponsible. That way, I could perhaps be a little more carefree and happy at work, at home, or at what ever that I've been doing.

Funny when I looked back into my past 25 years in life, I haven't really achieved great things that would or might make my life happier... not just easier... happier. Sure, there's been achievements in Wushu that I should really cherish. It have its wonderful moments but that have long past, in the history.

So now what? I just need to wait and see what 2009 brings for me.